Preparations and some final thoughts

So the time has come, I'm just a few days away from getting on a plane en route to Ben-Gurion Airport, Israel. Honestly, I don't know what to feel, I have these expectations of myself and of others but what I've realized is that in life, people never seem to really live up to your expectations. I guess that's a pessimistic way to look at it but I pride myself on being a realist, reality is, unfortunately, rarely optimistic.

I'm actually pretty scared, nervous, excited, and unsure? To be completely honest, I've deliberated canceling my flight, I've even called Delta and inquired as to how much that would cost. I don't know if that makes me a coward, but the whole point of this blog is honesty, maybe I don't really know. Students Crossing Boundaries has been difficult for me, thats really the bottom line. I have been confronted with fact-less arguments, faceless assaults on my belief system, and just many inconsistencies with the way the program itself was run.

Now, that being said, this blog was not meant to criticize SCB. The number one reason I didn't cancel my flight is because I'm part of a team. A team of mentors and fellows who support, challenge, and force me to grow. I think that's the best part of SCB and regardless of the criticism I had of the program itself I grew as a person and developed many relationships in the process. There were times that I voiced my concerns to the mentors and in response they worked to make me feel comfortable and they genuinely worked to make the program better. That's why I didn't cancel my flight, because I knew that these people put their faith, money, time, and commitment into me and now it was my turn to repay them. There are very few people in my life who ever exceed my expectations, but I can proudly tell the world that the SCB mentors and the SCB fellows have done more than that. They have gone above and beyond, not for themselves, but for me.

I guess that was a little bit of a purposeful rant, I don't know if I made much of a point but I hope this blog is the start of many thoughtful blogs to come.